Shelter Staff

Key Tips for Service Providers

Privacy in congregate housing

Privacy is important to most, if not all, survivors, and congregate shelter environments can make privacy difficult. Shelter environments can be overwhelming, and each survivor is navigating their own trauma and healing. Trans and nonbinary survivors may have additional concerns who knows they are trans, how others respond to their gender or body, and what they want others to know or not know about their bodies. For some trans people, there may be routine activities that could unintentionally disclose their trans identity, and these routines might be more guarded with greater need for privacy.  For example, close shaving sometimes several times a day, putting on a wig, using other gender affirming items or prosthetics.

To increase privacy, shelters can work to only have family members sharing bedrooms. If non-family members share bedrooms, consider creating privacy shields between beds.  Private spaces for shaving, changing clothes, applying makeup, managing medications, using prosthetics or other gender-affirming items, and attending to personal hygiene can be important to a survivor’s dignity and safety. These should not be treated as frivolous or unnecessary needs.

In shelters that already house all genders, try not to label rooms or sections as being for specific people. Having a “transgender” area could out people, as well as reinforce the idea that trans residents should be separate from everyone else or receive preferential services.

Whenever possible, shelters can design privacy into the environment for everyone. For example, shelters can limit shared bedrooms to family or household members, offer single-user bathrooms and changing areas, and use curtains, partitions, or other privacy barriers when unrelated residents share sleeping spaces.

Bathrooms, showers, and changing spaces

Bathrooms, showers, and changing spaces can be significant sources of concern for trans/nonbinary survivors, particularly when facilities provide limited privacy.

Whenever possible, shelters can provide private or single-user options that are available to all residents. When these intimate spaces are shared and not single-user, some privacy features can make spaces safer and more comfortable for everyone.  Some options are to ensure individual shower stalls or divisions, toilet partitions with locked doors, specific changing areas (which might be separate or connected to shower spaces), curtains, locks, and other privacy features.

Trans/nonbinary residents should not be isolated and required to use separate facilities solely because they are transgender. Staff should also avoid making assumptions about which bathroom or shower a resident should use based on appearance, identification documents, anatomy, or medical history.  If bathroom and shower facilities are sex-segregated, residents should be able to determine which option aligns with their identity and safety needs.

If another resident expresses discomfort, staff can acknowledge and address that person’s privacy needs without restricting a trans resident’s access or treating their presence as a safety problem.

For a deeper dive into bathrooms, showers and changing spaces, see

• Safe to Be, Safe to Pee: A policy toolkit on preventing sexual violence in bathrooms, locker rooms and changing areas.
• Safe to Be, Safe to Pee in English
• Seguridad para ser, seguridad para hacer pipí
• Accompanying webinar for Safe to Be, Safe to Pee

Clothing

Shelters can provide clothing, underwear, shoes, and personal care supplies for in a wide range of sizes and styles without assuming what someone will want based on their gender.

Whenever possible, allow survivors to select items themselves rather than having staff decide which clothing or supplies are appropriate for them. Consider offering shaving supplies for facial and body hair, hair-care products for different hair types, makeup and makeup-removal products, menstrual products, head coverings, and other commonly requested personal-care items.

Gender-affirming clothing and grooming items can have practical, emotional, and safety importance. For some survivors, having access to clothing and personal-care supplies that help them feel comfortable in their body or presentation may contribute to dignity and a sense of normalcy during a destabilizing time.

Interactions with other residents

Trans/nonbinary survivors may experience harassment, exclusion, tokenization, or objectification, excessive curiosity, or other micro- and macroaggressions from other residents. This could look like gossip about them, over-involvement in their lives, or something more direct and easily identified as harmful. Other residents engaging in these behaviors may not be aware they are treating trans people in an unfair manner, which might be especially true for cisgender residents who have not had many prior interactions with trans people or who may hold prejudicial beliefs or biases.

Staff can pay attention to group dynamics, check in with all survivors on how things are going, and work to ensure that everyone is included while also having alone time as they want.  It’s vital for staff to be aware of unnecessary monitoring of trans residents or treating trans individuals as being in more need for care or as a potential source of conflict.

Expectations about privacy, boundaries, harassment, and respectful behavior should apply to everyone rather than creating special rules for interactions with transgender residents.

Work schedules and curfews

Trans/nonbinary survivors are more likely to have non-traditional employment than cisgender survivors. (learn about employment discrimination here). Survivors may work part-time, work overnights, or have fluctuating hours. Some survivors, transgender or cisgender, may engage in sex work.

Rules such as curfews can unintentionally create barriers to employment, income, medical care, community connection, and other activities that support a survivor’s stability. Shelters can examine whether curfews and other restrictions are necessary for safety and, when rules are necessary, whether they can be implemented flexibly and equitably.

Practices that benefit all survivors

Trauma-informed, empowerment-based services

Many of the practices that would benefit trans/nonbinary survivors will benefit all survivors in shelter. These include using trauma-informed and empowerment-based models of care. including removing rules and restrictions (see The Earth Didn’t Fly Into the Sun) and ensuring that services are not mandatory. Survivors should not have to attend groups or access any other service in order to stay in shelter. It might be difficult for some shelters to critically examine the rules that have been in place and assessing why they are there, if the practices might actually be punitive or inconsistent with survivor autonomy.

Survivors should not have to demonstrate that they are a “good” or “compliant” survivor in order to receive shelter and services.  Empowerment-based services recognize that survivors have different needs. Some survivors may stay in shelter for three days to get a break from the violence at home. Some will stay until they find a new place to live. Some will continue speaking to the person who hurts them and some won’t. None of these decisions should be viewed as better or worse than others.  Empowerment-based advocacy recognizes survivors as experts on their own lives and avoids treating one set of choices as evidence that someone is more deserving, credible, or committed to safety than others.

Many domestic violence shelters are working to get rid of rules in the shelter. These changes support all survivors. Consider how existing rules and policies may be implemented unfairly.

Encourage safety, privacy, and respect.

Safety, privacy, and respect can be guiding principles for interactions between staff, between staff and residents, and between residents.

Staff can talk with all residents about expectations prior to arrival. This can include information about how the shelter is inclusive of all genders and what to expect in terms of privacy. Some people may determine that shelter will not be a good service for them. For those survivors, staff can work to find alternative safety resources.

Staff can use conflict resolution and de-escalation strategies to help when conflict arises at the shelter. Shelters can have practices in place to minimize harm and to reduce the likelihood that advocates will call law enforcement when there are challenges at the shelter. For many trans people, people of color, undocumented individuals, and others, law enforcement may not be a calming force to resolve conflict, but rather may cause heightened emotions, fear, and possibly even arrest and re-victimization.

When staff receive frequent  training on a wide range of subjects, they are more able to foster safe environments, de-escalate conflicts, and support survivors with respect. Supervision and staff meetings can be used to help navigate various situations and to check on how empowerment-based skills are being utilized in advocacy work.

Consider multiple forms of accessibility.

Trans people have high rates of disability. In addition to making shelters accessible for all genders; shelters can check for a wide range of accessibility.

Physical access: Is there access for people with mobility aids? Are bathrooms and showers wheelchair accessible? Are there beds that people with low mobility can get into? Is furniture able to hold larger body weights? Are emergency funds available for replacing accessibility supports a survivor may need?

Scent sensitivities and allergens: Does the shelter offer or use low or no-scent cleaning and hygiene products? Are residents and staff asked to avoid using perfumes? How is the carpet cleaned? Are there air filters and other devices to reduce allergens? Are residents able to wear face masks or is masking restricted?

Stimulation/sensory needs: Residents will have a range of sensory needs. Some will need low-sensory environments – darker spaces, with minimal visual and auditory stimulation. Others will need sensory input – fidget devices, adjustable lighting, varied textures.  Offering a variety of options in common spaces can be helpful. In private spaces, support residents to adapt their rooms to their needs. Offer lamps with variable settings, for example.

Plain language: How does the shelter communicate with survivors? Survivors will have a wide range of literacy levels as well as using multiple languages. Consider assessing all written materials to see if they use plain language. Use signs with pictures as well as words and communicate important information in multiple formats.

Cognitive and executive-function: Are instructions broken into manageable steps?  Are important information and schedules available in writing, electronically, verbally? Can survivors receive reminders – for mealtimes, appointments, hygiene, or anything else?  Does the shelter have ample access to notepads or other capture devices for people to take notes?  Survivors who are entering shelter will likely already be experiencing more difficulty with concentration, memory, and information processing, so having support in place for memory cues, reminders, and easy to access instructions will be useful for all survivors.

Common concerns from shelter staff

What about romantic/sexual relationships between residents?

Romantic or sexual relationships can develop between residents in any shelter, including sex-segregated shelters. Residents are adults and have the right to make decisions about their relationships. Blanket prohibitions can drive relationships underground, making it harder for residents to seek support if concerns arise. Staff can privately check in with residents, offer safety planning and information about boundaries and consent, and respond to signs of pressure, coercion, stalking, harassment, or abuse. These practices apply to relationships between residents regardless of gender or sexual orientation.

What about residents feeling triggered?

Survivors may have trauma responses to a wide range of stimuli.  A resident may experience a trauma response to another person’s appearance, voice, gender, behavior, or other characteristics. Experiencing a trauma response is real and deserves support, but it does not necessarily mean that the other person has done something harmful.

Staff can help residents identify coping and grounding strategies and discuss ways to increase their sense of safety without requiring another resident to hide their identity or leave simply because of who they are. At the same time, staff should distinguish trauma reminders from actual harmful behavior. Harassment, threats, boundary violations, coercion, or violence should be addressed if or when they occur. Residents can be prepared ahead of time for living in an all gender environment.  Staff and residents can discuss their concerns before moving into shelter or while they are living on site.

What if an abuser tries to stay here?

People who cause harm can be of any gender, and an abusive partner may attempt to access domestic violence services. Some abusive partners may try to access shelter out of genuine interest in getting support; some will do so as a way to prevent someone else from accessing services.  This possibility exists in both gender-integrated and sex-segregated programs.

Thoughtful, behavior-based screening and individualized assessment can help staff identify concerns without relying on gender, appearance, demeanor, or stereotypes about what a “victim” or “abuser” looks like. Survivors may be angry, distressed, guarded, or reactive, while people who use coercive control may appear calm or convincing. Effective screening can help prevent abusive partners from accessing services at the same shelter their partner is seeking services.

If staff learn that a resident is using the shelter to monitor, intimidate, stalk, or otherwise harm another survivor, they should respond to the behavior and prioritize the safety of the person being harmed. Depending on the circumstances, this may include safety planning, separating residents, increasing confidentiality protections, or requiring the person causing harm to leave.

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